Because I ended up taking the week off from exam reading (it started with needing a break, then became a case of having one forced on me by a three day migraine), I thought I would offer up a critique of--okay, really, a rant about--the most recent Twilight-related material to come my way: Top 20 Unfortunate Lessons Girls Learn From Twilight. This actually came at me from several directions: a friend on Facebook tagged me in a note where she reposted it, and another friend flagged it for my attention via Google reader.
I will point out, before I begin my rant, that I am not an obsessive Twilight fan-girl. I have read all four of the books, and found them entertaining but problematic on multiple levels--poorly written at times, rather immature, filled with sometimes disturbing obsessions. I've seen the movies, but found them, in parts, hilariously bad. I prefer my vampires to come in a James Marsters-wrapped package--picture to the right--rather than a Robert Pattinson one. But this isn't a Buffy post, as much as I would like it to be.
So, back to the point of origin for this rant: 20 unfortunate lessons girls learn from Twilight. I have problems with both the premises of such a list and quite a few of the so-called lessons.
Let's start with the most obvious premise: the idea that girls are "learning lessons" from the Twilight books. The underlying problem here is that some people have bought into the myth that all books "teach and delight." Clearly Twilight delights a fair number of people. Surely all those impressionable teenagers are looking to these books to teach them how the world works! Um, excuse me? While I do believe fantasy novels do tell us things about the real world, they do so usually on a pretty abstract level. The novels foil one-to-one comparisons precisely because, hey, we're talking about vampires and werewolves here (and I'll show exactly how this breaks down when I get to the specific lessons). Instead of saying that teenage girls are learning lessons from Twilight, I think it's probably more accurate to say that based on how girls are interpreting Twilight, we can tell what these girls probably already thought before they got hooked. While the list sometimes rings true because people know women who behave this way, I'm guessing that they didn't just start doing it because they read the Twilight novels. This is in some ways more scary than thinking Twilight is teaching these lessons, but only because it means we can't blame it on some stupid book.
The other basic, problematic premise here is that the boys in Twilight are actually in any way dangerous to Bella. The author of the list calls the novels "bad-boy-worshiping." The problem is, the two main boys in these novels aren't really bad boys at all. Both have sharp teeth and are supernaturally strong, but that's about as far as it goes. Edward not only won't drink Bella's blood, he won't have sex with her until after they are married, despite her incessant pressure to do both. That's not bad-boy behavior. Jacob is pretty much just as innocent. What makes the novels seem like they are bad-boy-worshiping is that both boys are afraid of being bad boys. They are both afraid they are bad because they are strong. But if there is a "lesson" in these novels, it is that strength does not make one good or bad, but that there is always a choice and the need for personal responsibility, even if your nature predisposes you to bad behavior. (ooh... I'm sensing some theology here...)
Anyway, on to a few of the so-called lessons. Many of the problems with these "lessons" is that they pick and choose facts from the novels--proof-texting of the worst sort. Take #1, for example:
1. If a boy is aloof, stand-offish, ignores you or is just plain rude, it is because he is secretly in love with you — and you are the point of his existence.
Clearly, the author of the list here is thinking about Edward. The problem, however, is that Bella isn't working just from the aloof and stand-offish behavior when deciding that Edward is in love with her. Edward tells her he's infatuated; he pretty much stalks Bella, coming into her room at night to watch her sleep (no invitation required!). He tells her flat out that she is the point of his existence. If boys don't do these things, girls "learning lessons" from the novels won't assume that the boys are secretly in love, etc.
It is at this point that I would like to point out one place where I do have a problem with the novels: "stalking" is not an acceptable proof of love. The novels are obsessed with obsession, and the line between innocent infatuation and obsession gets blurred far too much. But my point is that this list doesn't actually deal with the actual problems with the novels--it makes stuff up instead.
Here's an example of how translating "lessons learned" from a fantasy context into a real world context doesn't work:
14. If the boy you are in love with causes you (even indirectly) to be so badly beaten you end up in the hospital, you should tell the doctors and your family that you “fell down the steps” because you are such a silly, clumsy girl. That false explanation always works well for abused women.
Right, because telling them that a vampire tried to eat you wouldn't get you put in the psych ward. Let's also forget that Edward tried damn hard to keep her from being in danger, and that it was Bella being stupid enough to escape her assigned protectors that put her in danger. (Notice, I don't ever want to argue that Bella isn't often stupid or ridiculous--she is. But the problem here is that such stupidity is blindly obvious even to the teen girls who are obsessing over Edward and Jacob--not Bella. They want to BE Bella in part, I think, because they think they can do a better job of it than she can, and that Edward and Jacob deserve better.)
Let's look at another one of these lessons:
3. It’s OK for a potential romantic interest to be dimwitted, violent and vengeful — as long as he has great abs.
Well, Jacob does have great abs. However, he's not dimwitted. Violent and vengeful? Well, he's a werewolf who hunts vampires who are going around eating people. I suppose that's violent and vengeful, but that's again largely a matter of the fantasy genre. If this wasn't a fantasy novel, he'd be a cop from a family of cops, hunting a serial killer. We shouldn't mistake nature--vampire or werewolf--for character in these novels. And I don't think most teenage girls do.
Here's another problematic lesson that makes the mistake of confusing a behavior that happens in the book with one that the books imply are good:
14. It is extremely romantic to put yourself in dangerous situations in order to see your ex-boyfriend again. It’s even more romantic to remember the sound of his voice when he yelled at you.
Let's first note that "seeing" here is really "hallucinating." The novels fight pretty hard against the idea that this was a good thing on Bella's part. She actually almost dies from her behavior, which in turn leads Edward to almost commit suicide (rather than bringing him back to her), and brings her to the attention of the Vulturi (which gets them all almost killed several times over). Just because characters manage to survive their bad choices does not mean that the novels teach that such behavior is desired.
Here's another lesson learned only from intentionally mis-reading the novels:
15. Men can be changed for the better if you sacrifice everything you are and devote yourself to their need for change.
Well, this assumes that either Edward or Bella is changed for the better, or that Bella is sacrificing herself to either of their need for change. I don't think there's any evidence for this at all in the books. I'm trying to think of a single example where this is remotely true, or could even be misconstrued as such, but I can't think of any.
I think that it's telling that by the time we get to the last three or four lessons, they aren't really lessons at all, but tired observations, that cannot be learned from the books even if they ought to be ("17. Girls shouldn’t always read a book series just because everyone else has"), or have nothing to do with teenage girls ("18. When writing a book series, it's acceptable to lift seminal source material and basterdize it with tired, overwrought teenage angst"), or reflect the fact that Twilight is only a small if obvious part of a much larger, much older shift in what Vampires signify in our culture ("20. Vampires — once among the great villains of literature and motion pictures — are no longer scary. In fact, they’re every bit as whiny, self-absorbed and impotent as any human being"). But that last one deserves its own post some other time.
Read more...